Resolving the Naruto Shipping Wars



For those of you living under a rock, Naruto is a manga series about a ninja who wears orange. It also had a complete bullcrap ending. It was pretty much exactly the same as Harry Potter’s “BABIES EVER AFTER” ending. The Western Naruto fandom collectively flipped their shit over it. My favourite reaction has to be from a tumblr person who has since deleted their account, who had this to say:

I’m so upset right now, I just deleted everything Narusaku related in my computer, I tore up all my narusaku drawings that were hanging on my wall for years now, I threw away all my naruto manga & DVD collection into the garbage, I ripped apart all my posters…I literally wanted to burn everything instead but I live in apartments so I obviously can’t start a fire. I’m not bashing or anything I just feel like all of this was pointless…completely pointless. I wasted so much money…so much time… I can never get back…

So. It’s been a year. We’ve all had time to cool our heads and get used to the fact that Naruto and Hinata copulated and had a kid with the unfortunate name of Bolt. Sasuke and Sakura also had a kid with the even more unfortunate name of Salad. There’s even a sequel movie focusing on the kids, and it doesn’t look like the parents got a divorce. Are the Naruto shipping wars finally over?

I can’t remember the last time I gave a toss about Naruto. I did watch The Last: Naruto the Movie, but it was dreadfully lame. Evidently some people are still salty about the romance, though.

In November this year, YA author Amy McNulty published an article on Anime News Network entitled The Neverending Debate over the End of Naruto. The article was pretty much entirely a summary and contained only the bare bones of an opinion, but it was a nice refresher course on the intricacies of Naruto shipping. The comments, on the other hand, were all over the map. They ranged from “lol why is this even an ANN article” to “THAT ENDING WAS A PILE OF INCREDIBLY FETID POOP”.

Here are some of my favourite comments from the forums:

#847085: The naruhina was not wrong, there could be, but was not developed as the NaruSaku. sasusaku the shit is just an insult to all the fans and an insult to ethics.

BVerfG: Of course I supported Sasuke x Naruto, as any reasonable person would.

Myaow: My inner 14-year-old is so salty over Sakura becoming a housewife and naming her kid Salad! BOOOO.

infamoustakai: The bottom line is, Naruto and Sakura should’ve been together. Plain and simple. She had development and Hinata did not. All signs pointed to them being together and yet we come up empty handed. Development was thrown out the window to satisfy a large group of fans rather than having it naturally end. Because of that, I can’t be a fan of Naruto any more.

Animefun17: I loved how this manga ended and I thank Kishimoto for giving us Naruto.

totherpage95: both naruto and hinata are horrible parents in my eyes now and they were the “nice” characters in the original series but somehow when they are married to each other something went wrong.

Ifollowrivers:  I’m sorry, but this article is biased and misses the whole point Kishimoto tired to convey as well as misinterpreting the manga and Sasuke. If you want to write about this never ending debate do so with tact to the characters and Kishimoto. I’m sure he doesn’t appreciate his message being misconstrued on what is “the internet’s most trusted anime news source”.

Tyler Bregg: hell the damn animes still running and now we got Brouto even after the movie before it said Naruto THE LAST MOVIE NaurxHina is the one I was hoping for since I saw them remember back in the day when Sakura was usless and whiny and a shitty tsundere everyone I knew wanted NaruXsomeone else

Emb3rrzz: I could have lived with NH being shipped, i really didn’t mind but he [Kishimoto] made one of my favorite characters look like trash because he couldnt uphold his end in not shipping NS and that isnt ok.

SolidAndrew34: Forgiveness is key to the story so we should not criticize Sakura for forgiving Sasuke along with Naruto … I have loved Naruto since I was a kid and I still do as a man in my 20’s because I relate to it on such a personal level with Naruto’s kindness, message of hope, the desire for peace, understanding between people, and happiness it promotes between them.

Kyiba: Typical raging yaoi fans, they ignore Sasuke relationship with Sakura but think Sasunaru makes more senseDo tell , how could a ship which lacks Mutual development much less a development in their friendship be better than a ship which hassurpassed more than that.

So yeah, you can see that while the Great Shinobi War might be over, the shipping wars aren’t. Maybe Madara was right when he tried to destroy the world because of too much war.

War. War never changes.



  1. Urg. I’ve spent the last 5 years trying to forget my past as the Naruto fanboys and narusaku shipper, and you have to bring it back. This must be how Himura Kenshin felt, being unable to run away from his sins.

    Jokes aside, the entire Shinobi War arc is complete garbage. Like 99% shounen author, Kishimoto proved that he can draw and write huge fight, but incapable of understanding human mindset and philosophy. This manga and Gundam Seed confirm that war+power fantasy+shipping=complete shit.

  2. Forget all this bullcrap. I can’t forgive Kishimoto for taking Anko “huh, why am I being aroused by a woman licking blood off a teen’s cheek?” Mitarashi and turning her into some sort of overweight middle-aged housewife that’s pretty much as threatening as my grandma. I mean, I stopped really giving a fuck about Naruto WAAAY long ago (I couldn’t put together a coherent summary of the plot after the very beginning of the Shippuuden series), but the extents to which Kishimoto went to purposefully shit on all female characters of the cast are baffling. I understand it’s a “shonen” manga, but I don’t see why you can’t simply focus more on male characters without the need to also give the female characters as bland and uninteresting lives as possible.

    • I actually didn’t mind that Anko gained weight. I thought it was amusing, even. It’s rare to see a character’s appearance change so dramatically without any explanation. And maybe she is still a badass fighter even with that figure, like Chouji. We only see her in like one panel, after all.

      But in general, I agree with you. The girls seemed to get the short of the stick more often than not in this series. I think Kishimoto has said that he has trouble writing/drawing female characters, not that it excuses the outrageous sexism lol.

      • It just doesn’t make much sense though. The very idea that “he has trouble” writing them means he posed himself the problem to begin with. Naruto’s characters are overall pretty shallow and two-dimensional anyway, so who cares? He could have given the same exact range of personalities to female characters and they would have felt just as real (the drawing part isn’t his fault, though seriously, he IS a shitty artist in general, and when he started more so. Even amongst shonen authors he’s got nothing neither on Oda’s visual creativity, nor on Toriyama’s stark clarity, Kubo’s stylishness or Murata’s amazing dinamicity. He just kinda does the job).

        About Anko, yeah, but I guess the general nerfing of all women (the Mizukage got the same treatment too) never made me consider that option. It’s just like even badass ninjas ought to let themselves go once they achieve their lifelong aspiration of having a husband and children. Tsunade may be the series’ only subversion of this trope, but it’s basically meant to look like her main *flaw*.

  3. I will admit I’m sad because I am a Narusaku, Sasukarin, Kibahina shipper.Still I don’t care about Naruhina being canon, it never really bothered me.(Sasusaku on the otherhand can go rot in hell.)But I accept it and got over it.

    The thing that bothers me to no end is some of the children.Saiino child reminds me of a horror movie that I watched some time ago(can’t remember the name) pale skin with blond hair and blue eyes reeeeally doesn’t go well. Chokarui kid is just a fat “ganguro” to me.Naruhina daughters design looks so weird.

    They are not that bad when you mention the Sasusaku child…. THAT’S DESING PRACTICALLY SCREAMS SASUKARIN JUST WTF, why does she look so identical to Karin just why, And why in the heavens name she is named “SALAD” ?!?!?!?!?!?

  4. It’s certainly sad to see how deeply hatred runs in a fandom activity that is purportedly about love. But thankfully, this is not true everywhere. It seems that the victory of NaruHina has elicited a huge wave of positive catharsis from even the darkest and most corrupted citizens of the web. Testimonials from a certain H-manga site:

    neh1234: Damn is this the power of best girl winning? Even the hardcore mindbreak lover nanashi did this?

    hibeef01: Jesus christ my heart wasn’t ready! Too pure, too pure for my jaded soul.

    zrox: This is too pure for the ones with evil eyes such as us! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

    lemeres: heterosexual sex in missionary position between people that love each other?
    This is your sickest work yet nanashi.

    junhezhin: The inner 13 year old NaruHina fan in me fucking loves this
    I almost wish that I still liked Naruto as much as I did way back in middle school so that I can enjoy this even more

    Godfather922: The art is so good oh my god. I don’t even care if this is a NaruHina. So adorable.

    iiLunar: Well now we know how Boruto was made. Ohoho!

    FakeFx: I don’t even like Naruto and this is one of the best doujins I’ve ever read. Believe it!

    jenovasilver: It was so cute, I was saying ‘Awww’ during the whole thing, especially when Naruto said Hinata was soft and fluffy.

    Drax: An author that makes guro and that king of doujins doing a vanilla..that’s THE POWER OF NARUHINA MOTHEF*CKERS!!

    MonMon19: >An artist who specializes in drawing guro, mindbreak, bestiality and rape
    >makes a doujin about a just married couple
    >who engages in consensual sex
    >in the missionary position
    >for the sole purpose of procreation
    >while holding hands
    Oh shit son! This here is the true definition of VANILLA. Pure, unadulterated motherfucking VANILLA!

    lastperv: >nanashi
    >happy sex
    nah, i dont buy it
    waitin for the sequel where she shoves a ninja star up his urethra

    …well, you can’t win ’em all.

  5. I promoted Naru x Hina when I was dumber, was a shipper, and still cared about Naruto. All I have to say is “—- YOU ALL MY DUMBER SELF WON YOUR TEARS ARE DELICIOUS”

  6. It is quite clear in the manga that SS is the end game especially with those subtle hints about Sasuke and Sakura’s relationship since Part I. I am fine with NH, but there is something lacking with the couple, even if they released the Last movie just to satisfy that lacking.

    Also, even if there is no kissing scene shown for SS, the infamous forehead tap at Chapter 699 still gave a lot of impact than the NH’s kissing scene (which undoubtedly, in my opinion, just a ripped off scene from common moonlight kiss scenes).

    NaruSaku, on the other hand, has also developments in the series, but the couple doesn’t have the ‘chemistry’ and is better off as ‘bestfriends’.

    Just a honest thought though.

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